You're Doing the Right Thing

There is a lot to be said for the comfort and the power of getting confirmation from someone else. Mine came from two other mothers (who are not so new as me - their children are nine and eleven months) who listened to my current struggle with increasing my milk production so that I can exclusively breastfeed (i.e., no more formula supplement). One of the mothers exclusively breastfeeds and got to that point by constant nursing and making sure she was eating and drinking enough. The other never managed to exclusively breastfeed in spite of trying everything - constant nursing, using a supplemental nursing system, downing copious amounts of fenugreek and blessed thistle and kale smoothies, and eventually taking domperidone. The domperidone doubled her milk production, but still didn't get her to the point of exclusively breastfeeding.

So there's no right answer. These two mothers couldn't just tell me exactly what to do and promise that it would work. But they understood my frustration and my efforts and they just nodded and said, yes, you're doing the right thing.

I hope so because I'm not there yet. But I'm still working on it.

To start, we've really cut back on the formula supplements. Instead of automatically giving Lucas a couple of ounces after every feeding, we wait to see how he acts after nursing. If he's crying for more, then we give him some. But if not, then we don't give it to him and just stick him back on the breast when he acts hungry again. This week we're down to only giving him anywhere from zero to four ounces a day.

I've also been nursing as much as possible and have started taking Lucas to bed around 11 pm for a final night feeding. This lets him suck for as long as he wants, and if I get bored or sleepy, then I can just fall asleep. As a bonus, Lucas loves to lie close to me and he falls into such a deep sleep that I can then transfer him to the cosleeper next to our bed and he sleeps until at least 6 am (and sometimes as late as 9 am!).

Another thing I'm doing is trying to make sure I eat and drink at least a normal amount! It sounds like an obvious thing to do, but at first I was finding all of my time occupied by a baby who never sleeps during the day unless he's being held and I felt like I couldn't find the time to eat. But now I've been trying to make sure I'm eating enough, and today I stocked up at Trader Joe's on easy but healthy things to eat (like yogurt smoothies).

I've also had some beer, which is rumored to increase prolactin levels and so people think that it could increase milk supply. However, by "people", I don't mean doctors or scientists. I figured I would try it and so I had a couple of beers in the past week, and ... who knows. I'm not exactly isolating factors here and observing the effects one by one. So I really couldn't parse out the effects of beer, if any. Actually, reading about it more, it looks like there is evidence that alcohol actually decreases milk supply, even though it might make you feel fuller and you might think you are producing more. So, given that, I think I'll probably hold off on alcohol for now for the most part.

Finally, I've been taking More Milk Plus, which contains fenugreek seed, blessed thistle, nettle leaf, and fennel seed. I just ran out (I had about a third of a bottle from a friend who'd used it), but a friend picked up some fenugreek seed and blessed thistle capsules for me and I'll start using that tomorrow.

And what's the result? I really don't know! I kind of feel like I'm producing more, but not by leaps and bounds. I guess I shouldn't expect to be overflowing at this point, and that the truth is in however much supplement we still have to give him. And since that's going down, then I must be making some progress. But it's hard not to worry. I am trying to be aware of Lucas' needs and not be too driven by my own desire to exclusively breastfeed him - I don't want to starve him! So my current approach is to let him feed as much as he seems to want to when he nurses, until he finally falls off or falls asleep. If he's tugging and complaining, or if he cries a lot when we stop, then that's when we give him a little bit of supplement. Interestingly, this often happens at night - is he just being fussy? Or do I produce less milk in the evening and he truly is hungry after nursing? It's hard to know!

So you can see why hearing other mothers tell me I'm doing the right thing is nice to hear. I have enough of a dialog in my head about whether I'm doing this right. And although J is being completely supportive about my efforts, he also worries too. Neither of us want to be keeping our baby hungry!

(You might wonder why I'm not pumping in addition to nursing. Basically, I don't because I can't. If Lucas slept during the day somewhere other than in the Baby Bjorn, then maybe I could do it. But when it's just me and him, as it is during the day, then I really can't pump. The best I am managing to do is to pump in the middle of the night on the occasions I wake up due to Lucas grunting as if he is going to wake up but then he goes back to sleep. The last time I did that I got about twice as much as I used to get when I pumped. So that's a good thing, right?)

So I will continue to try. And now, Lucas and I are off to bed!

Comments

[Tanja]

Hey - you ARE doing the right thing! I think what you're doing is awesome. Down to 0-4 ounces a day sounds like basically you're already there. You should be really proud of yourself, since you're obviously doing a great job being a mom and feeding your baby. I think you'll make it all the way (definitely hope so, since it's going to make things easier in the long run I think). Hopefully I'll run into you guys on campus again soon!

[jcm]

As far as our pediatricians were concerned, when we were down to 0-6 ounces of formula supplementing a day, they considered baby to be exclusively breastfed. The really hard part for me was *constantly* having to decide whether or not to offer formula. I was sick of making decisions.

[karenology]

You are such a conscientious mother. Lucas is lucky!